Does it make lesser of a man who admits of being dumped? A man’s ego would usually prohibit them from disclosing that there are instances that women overpower them. But I do believe that a true man is someone who is not afraid to face the truth despite existing in a society that is judgemental.
I have been dumped, a couple of times. But despite the ache of admitting it, I have learned life’s lessons through these experiences. Here’s what I have to share:
Lesson #1: It Takes Two
When a man is heartbroken, it is very difficult to show how he really feels. The connotation that men are tough is commonly interpreted the wrong way. Society dictates that a man should never show emotional weakness, and this becomes my ticket for blaming the other person for all the heartaches I am experiencing. A relationship has two main characters: me and my partner. Through evaluation I have come to admit that being part of the relationship, I am also responsible for the problems that occurred, and that I have equal powers with my partner to solve these problems when they arrived.
Lesson #2: Women Need Their Personal Space
Many men tend to become possessive of their partners. It is a must that a woman gives full details of whatever activity she may have, including the people that she will be with. Although we are aware that women enjoy the part of being the right hand of a man, there are times that she should be given her personal space. By allowing her to have her own time, you send the message that you trust her. But in cases wherein you have experienced having been cheated by a woman, that becomes the problem. Trust is a vital component of the relationship, and if trust with each other will be lost, you may be invading your partner’s personal freedom without you knowing it. And of course, feeling that she is being confined, your woman will force herself away from the relationship.
So why do we need to give our women a breathing space? Because we do not own them! We all are human beings who need to grow. Limiting ourselves with only a few people can hinder our personal growth, much less if we focus on a lone person.
Lesson #3: You Get Stronger Over Time
The philosopher Frederick Nietzsche once said “that which doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger.” True. The pain that we feel after the break up is immeasurable. You may think that you are being cut over and over again every time the memories come back. Sad to say, but there are men who end their lives because they think that they can never get over the heartache. It’s like haunting you. But little did we know, each morning, as we wake up to another day, the hurting subsides gradually. Time can heal the wounds left by the break up. The scar that will be forever etched in your heart shall remind you not to make the same mistakes again whenever you find somebody new. A positive attitude towards life, your family and friends and other people around you are your most valuable possessions that will aid you to get over the pain. Utilize all the memories you have of the past relationship/s, be it good or bad, to your advantage in becoming a better person. So the next time you stumble, get up and hold your head high.
Lesson #4: Learn to Accept the Truth
Acceptance plays a major role in the process of healing. A relationship will never last if in the first place, it really wasn’t meant to be. If your destiny is not designed to end with that particular person, try as you may, it will never be. Even people who have already started planning the future – getting married, having children, having a family business etc., and even married people still part ways. However, coping up and learning to accept and face the reality that you two are not meant for each other will allow you to move on with dear life. The break up may be taken positively, in the sense that, it is best that it ended earlier rather than later when both of you have already given too much emotional investment in the relationship.
Lesson #5: Good Things Happen Unless You Make Them Happen
And finally, the last lesson I want to share with you is that you are in control of your own self. Sure, what had happened was beyond manageable, but how you reacted on the situation makes you part liable with the outcome. Remember, “You reap what you sow”
There are a lot of fish in the ocean, go out, meet new women and just enjoy life. Eventually, the one person that is really meant for you will come your way. And this time, instinct will dictate on what you should do.
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